The Handsomest Drowned Man In The World

The children playing by the waves, seeing the dark bulge drift in from the sea, imagined it was an old ship. Then they saw it had no mast and their thoughts turned to a whale. But when it washed upon the beach, they removed the seaweed clumps, the jellyfish tentacles, and the fish remains. Only then did they see the drowned man.

They played with him all afternoon, burying him in the sand and digging him up again, until a woman saw the spectacle and spread the alarm in the village. The men who carried him to the nearest house noticed he weighed more than any man they had ever known, as much as a horse or a great shark, and they told each other that maybe he’d been floating too long and the water had soaked into his bones.

When they laid him on the floor they said he was the tallest man they’d carried because he barely fit in the room, but they thought that maybe the ability to keep growing after death was part of the nature of certain drowned men. He had the smell of the sea about him and only his shape hinted that it was a human corpse, because the skin was covered with a thick crust of mud and scales.

Without seeing his face, they knew that this dead man was a stranger. The village had only twenty or so wooden houses — each with its stone courtyards and overflowing vines — which spreadout out like a fan from where the river met the sea. So when they came upon the encrusted drowned man, they looked at each other and knew that none were missing.

That night the men did not work the sea. Some traveled to nearby villages to ask after missing people, and the women tended to his body. They removed the mud with grass swabs, they picked pebbles from his scalp, and with jagged tools used for cleaning fish they scraped the scales from his body. The women saw that the sea vegetation falling in little clumps on the dirt floor came from unfamiliar places and his clothes were filled with small vertical tears, as if he had floated through labyrinths of coral. They saw, too, that he faced death with a calm grace; he did not have the frantic eyes or frightened grimace of other drowned men. But only when they had finished hours later did they see the man in his natural state and it left them breathless. Not only was he the biggest, strongest, most stately specimen to chance upon their village, but his presence left no room in their imagination.

There was no bed large enough nor table sturdy enough to use for a wake. The summer clothes of the village’s tallest man would not fit him, nor the shoes of the villager with the largest feet. Fascinated by his size and beauty, the women made him pants from a piece of sturdy sail and a shirt from a large tablecloth. As they sewed, sitting cross-legged in a circle and sneaking glances at the body, it seemed that the wind had never been so unrelenting nor the sea so turbulent as on that night. In their silent reverie they saw him, strolling and smiling in their village, living in the house with the widest doors, his tall ceiling beyond anyone’s reach, secured by the sturdiest floor. They imagined his bed, carved from the hull of a giant sailship, held together by iron bolts, with his wife the liveliest, loveliest woman. They could hear his booming voice, drawing fish out from the sea simply by speaking their names. And they could not help but compare him to their own husbands, and they knew that he could do more in one night than theirs could in a generation. So they let theirs go, believing them weak and cowardly. As they wandered through that desert of fantasy, the eldest woman, who looked upon him first with compassion, sighed before she spoke.

‘His name is Dante.’

They looked at him, lying there on the now muddy floor, and they knew that it was true. Soon the wind died and the sea became drowsy. The heavy silence crushed their doubts and they were sure: he was Dante. These women who had made his clothes, combed his hair and shaved his face trembled with sorrow as they resigned themselves to dragging him along the ground. They understood then the burden his huge body bore in life and now in death. They saw him, forced to enter doors sideways, cracking his head on crossbeams, standing with hunched back and no room to stretch his legs or rest his arms. They could hear the lady of the house, looking for a sturdy chair and begging him, frightened and fascinated, sit here Dante, please, and he would instead crouch on the ground, lean against the wall, smiling, don’t bother miss, I can manage, his knees aching from having done the same thing many times, to avoid the embarrassment of breaking the chair, or overturning the table, and perhaps not knowing that the ones who smiled as they said don’t go, Dante, at least wait until the coffee’s ready, they were the ones who would whisper after, how nice, that handsome fool is gone and we can relax again.

As dawn approached, that very thought was on the women’s minds. So they covered his face with a linen handkerchief and so hidden he looked defeated, like the shrunken husbands of their secret reverie. One of the younger girls began weeping despite her best efforts. Soon the room was filled with sniffs which became wails and fed back on its own intensity as they poured tears for Dante, their poor, peaceful, obliging Dante. When the men returned with news that the drowned man was not from neighboring villages, the women felt a burst of jubilation amidst their tears.

‘Praise the Lord,’ they shouted, ‘he’s ours!’

The men saw those red faces and glistening eyes and thought it frivolous. After a sleepless night of tense inquiries, they wanted to remove the newcomer and start afresh before the sun became unbearable. They improvised a stretcher and tied it together with many lashes of seaworthy rope so that it would hold the weight of the body until they reached the cliffs. They wanted to tie an anchor to him so that he would vanish into the deepest waves, and stray currents would not wash him back to shore. But the faster they moved, the more cunning the women became in their delays. One would fasten a rusted bracelet to his wrist, another would pin a threaded ribbon on his shirt, yet another would place charms in his pockets for good luck, and after much repeating of stop doing that, woman, keep away, look you almost made me trip on the dead man, the men began to feel an uneasiness in their stomachs and started grumbling about why so many baubles and decorations for a stranger, because no matter how much they blessed and warded him, the sharks would chew him all the same, but they kept piling on their old relics, shuffling to and fro, while they sighed and sniffled, so that the men finally erupted with why do all of you raise such a ruckus over an ungainly corpse, a rotting nobody, a piece of cold sea-soaked meat. An older woman, shocked at their casual attitude, removed the linen handkerchief from his face and the men were left breathless, too.

The men knew he was Dante. It was not necessary to say it yet again. There could only be one Dante and there he lay, arms akimbo, shoeless, wearing ill-fitting pants made of sail, and with gleaming trinkets that made him seem like a god of Incan myth. And from his face they knew that he was ashamed, that he could not deny the burden of being so big or heavy or handsome, and if he had foreseen this tortuous journey, he would have found a more discreet place to drown in, honest, I even would have tied that anchor around my neck and crawled my way off the cliff not to upset people with this piece of cold meat, as you people say. His manner was so genuine that even the most hardened men, the ones who felt the lonely edge of endless nights at sea fearing that their women would stop dreaming about them and start dreaming of drowned strangers, even they and others who were harder still trembled in the chambers of their hearts at Dante’s sincerity.

And that is the origin of the most lavish funeral a village of twenty or so wooden houses could manage for a solitary drowned man. The women who had gone to get flowers in neighboring villages returned with other women who could not believe the story, and those women hurried home for more flowers still when they saw him, and more and more flowers and people began to appear, neighbors of the neighbors and so on, all wanting to see for themselves. But when the funeral ended they could not bear to carry him to the waters as an orphan and so they chose a father and mother from the best family, and named aunts and uncles and cousins and nephews, so that all the inhabitants of the village became his kinsmen.

While they fought for the honor of bearing him on their shoulders along the steep escarpment by the cliffs, all became aware of the virginal emptiness of their streets, the dusty stones in their courtyards, the narrowness of their dreams as they absorbed the splendor of their drowned kin. They finally let him go without an anchor so he could return if he so desired, and as one they held their breath, the wind fluttering about and the sea’s crashing waves, as they imagined him floating into the abyss. They knew then that things must change, that their houses would need wider doors and higher ceilings and softer floors with sturdy chairs so that Dante’s memory could come and go without trouble and no one in the future would dare mutter the big handsome fool finally died, too bad, because they were going to paint their house fronts bright colors to make his memory eternal and they were going to labor hard in the unbearable sun digging springs and planting flowers on the cliffs so that in future years at sunrise the passengers on passing boats would awaken, and with drowsy eyes they would see the rows upon rows of sunflowers and roses and the captain, who would have come down amidst all the chatter, would point to the village with its twenty or so wooden houses where the river met the sea and say, look there, see that village where the sun’s so bright the sunflowers don’t know which way to turn, yes, over there, that’s Dante’s village.

***

The above is my remix of a beautiful short story by Gabriel Garcia Marques. Here’s another example.

6 more simple beautiful piano songs to play (with pdfs)

Given the popularity of this post, here are the sheet music for 6 more beautiful piano songs. Not all are “simple” (especially the latter part of Hanarete Imo), but I think you’ll enjoy them.

  1. Legends of the Fall theme song
  2. Hanarete Imo (Even When We’re Apart) by Jun K (I’m not confident about the title or author)
  3. My Heart Will Go On by James Horner, theme song from Titanic
  4. I Believe, theme song from My Sassy Girl (these are jpgs)
  5. Yi Ran Ai Ni by Wang Leehom (王力宏-依然爱你)

*sorry there are only 5 now, I had a copyright claim to take down one of them

I’m looking to expand my library so please send me more!

Slavoj Zizek is a crazy dude (who might be right)

Slavoj Zizek is crazy, bombastic and possibly a genius.

Wikipedia has this to say:

He has been labelled by some the “Elvis of cultural theory” and Foreign Policy listed him on its 2012 list of Top 100 Global Thinkers, calling him “a celebrity philosopher.”

Slavoj Zizek fans are telling you: I think differently, often radically. I am a little nihilist. This is my intuition, and I’m still figuring out my own reaction.

The below notes are from his Authors@Google talk, one of his more thorough talks on YouTube.

  • ideology — the network of ethical, political, social prejudices — is everywhere, it structures our lives
  • Donald Rumsfeld’s famous quote before the Gulf War — “there are known knowns, known unknowns, etc…”
    • but what about unknown knowns? knowledge so embedded in our lives that we don’t know that we know them
    • another example of unknown known: structure of toilets; there are 3 types (French toilets have hole in the back, German hole in front, UK doesn’t matter because it’s circular and big bowl of water)
      • this positioning is not purely utilitarian
      • analogous to European trinity, which is a way of describing all European society — Germans (conservative, thinkers), France (evolutionary, into politics), UK (liberal-centrist, utilitarian, into economics)
      • when you really dig into why toilets are constructed the way they are, that’s the only way to account for it (Germans are metaphysical, reflective, French want it to disappear, UK is a blend)
      • maybe even more than eating, shitting is reflection of a civilization
  • how do we deal with ideology today?
    • Niels Bohr, in response to why he followed a particular superstition, said, “I don’t believe in it, but I was told it works even if I don’t believe in it”
    • that’s how ideology works today
    • we practice beliefs without believing in them
    • in the past we publicly believed things and privately didn’t; now we publicly don’t believe things and privately do
    • there is a vaguely Dalai Lama-esque spiritualism
    • we believe much more than we admit to believing
  • think about canned laughter on TV — the purpose is not necessarily Pavlovian (to trigger your laughing), but literally that it laughs for you, it does the work for you; why does it work?
    • like Tibetan prayer wheel, it prays for you, it does the work
  • Israel is most atheist country in world, but its claim to land relies on God giving them the West Bank; ironically 60-70% of Israeli Jews don’t believe in God
  • most important is that we believe others believe; we need that more than our own belief
  • Gore Vidal — well-known bisexual
    • when they asked him, “was your first sexual experience with a man or a woman?”, he replied, “I was too polite to ask”
  • it’s impossible to fully understand each other, because we don’t even understand ourselves
  • we’re missing a code of discretion
  • religion is often employed after-the-fact to justify certain actions
  • example: Japanese Zen Buddhist community, which ostensibly is about peace and non-confrontation, how did they think about the invasion of China, the atrocities Japan committed in 1930s, 40s?
    • with exception of a few dissidents, not only did the Zen Buddhist community fully support the war but provided justification for it!
    • Suzuki, a Zen Buddhist who became well-known in the US in 1960s and 70s, was writing different texts in 1930s and 40s, arguing that Japanese invasion of China was work of love, to heal them; even gave advice on how a soldier can train himself psychologically to kill: the Buddhist belief in overcoming your “false self”, stabbing an enemy becomes depersonalized, you’re a 3rd party observer; military discipline is a great way to achieve Enlightenment
    • Suzuki’s meditations are authentic, and he’s not saying it’s purely militaristic, it’s just that the stories and narrative we construct about and for ourselves are always ideological
  • another example: hardcore porn
    • a porn film must have some narrative, yet it’s incredible how self-mocking they are
    • they do this on-purpose; “you can see it all, but the price you pay is to remove emotional involvement” (i.e. you can’t have a dramatic and touching film with hardcore porn)
    • gonzo sex — embedded journalism; don’t even pretend it’s a story; cameraman gives directions, woman talks to camera like it’s a director, this is high point of censorship — afraid to even have a minimum of narrative
  • in ideology, there’s always tension between what’s explicit and what’s understood
    • to penetrate social circle — whether a company, a nation, a social group — you must know the rules, but the rules are always mysterious
    • for example, in corrupt countries there are prohibitions which are meant to be violated (e.g., it’s illegal but accepted to bribe a cop or bureaucrat)
    • for example, in Japan, work contracts have 40 days of holiday but you’re not supposed to take more than 20
      • this is how links between people are created, like a shared secret
  • “not only that something is prohibited…but prohibition itself is prohibited from being stated publicly”
    • Stalinism — not only was criticizing Stalin prohibited, but even worse was announcing this publicly; so if you came to Stalin’s defense and said, ‘you cannot criticize Stalin’, that was just as bad as criticizing him!
  • evolution of advertising
    • at first advertising was utilitarian — you should buy a truck to get work done in the field
    • then it was symbolic — status symbol, Land Rover = I have money
    • today, it’s neither utilitarian nor symbolic, it’s about self-actualization, self-fulfillment, buy a Land Rover and you will be your best self, achieve your dreams
    • for example, organic food — why do we buy a rotten, 2x pricier organic apple; it’s not because we REALLY believe it’s better for our health, it’s to make us feel good (“I’m more authentic, I’m helping the world”)
  • beneath official message, always subtext
    • ideology always offers you some bribery
    • in Nazi Germany it was sacrifice for your country, do your duty; hidden message: kill some Jews, have some fun, be powerful
    • in 1900s American South, it was Christian values, community, family; hidden message: rape some women, lynch black people, have some fun
    • how about donate $20, feed a child in Africa? hidden message: don’t worry about poverty and global inequality, spend $20 and payoff your conscience
  • how to understand Sarah Palin, hidden message was: giving voice to rage of ordinary people, but things will stay same in background
    • previously female politicians were phallic, imitated men — Indira Gandhi, Margaret Thatcher (me: even Hillary to a degree)
    • Sarah Palin is more feminine yet still strong; mother, sex object AND leader, this “sarcastic assertiveness”
    • in Obama, skinny, big ears, something of the slightly weak/emaciated guy in him, Sarah Palin subtly alludes to it
  • in education today, we need more philosophy, even to solve basic problems like bioethics, abortion
  • most modern liberalism is “global capitalism with a human face”
  • maybe liberal democratic capitalism isn’t the ultimate horizon
  • Marxists always believed train of history was on their side
  • Intellectual Property is closer to Communism than Capitalism — hard to contain within limits of private property
    • look at Bill Gates, went from garage to richest man in world in 30 years, hard to say his markets work properly, that they accurately reflect his contributions
  • loves the details
    • look at totalitarian speeches e.g. Hitler; when audience applauses, Hitler accepts
    • look at communist speeches, e.g., Stalin; when audience applauses, Stalin joins the applause
  • God is the original proxy; I don’t know, but He knows for me
  • what is evil? something that brutally interrupts the status quo; it’s a cut
    • Jesus Christ is evil embodied for traditional pagan religions
    • one way to look at evil: we are doing something terribly great, something crazy, just need to do it more slowly, it’s the negative dimension/realization that what you’re doing is a huge change
    • in order to say “don’t be evil”, you must already dwell in the space of evil

Documentary on China’s pollution problem…mind blasted

On my roommate’s recommendation, I watched a powerful documentary about China’s deepening smog and pollution problem. While spending 2013 in Shanghai, I became a fair-weather vegetarian because for weeks, dead pigs were floating toward the city from an upstream tributary, and no one knew why. The government’s eventual explanation was “tainted feed”, but the uncertainty and distrust lingered.

I was also one of the stupid expats who jogged outside from time to time, sans air mask…won’t be doing that again!

(in fairness I enjoyed my Shanghai stay-cation and visit often, this is just a small slice of the experience)

The talk is more than 1.5 hours, but the first 30 minutes are its most gripping. Here’s a link with English subtitles [YouTube].

My notes:

  • there’s a strong correlation between air pollution and lung cancer incidence
  • this fact surprised me: severe pollution has been a reality since the early 2000s; it’s not just a recent problem; back then, a lot of the smog was labelled fog
  • the talk also gave historical context: how England went through a worse, more acute smog battle in early 1900s, 10K+ died; the rising pollution problems in India and Iran
  • China depends on these “heavy industries” for jobs and social stability
  • pollution is worse in winter months, due to increased coal usage (and much of the winter coal is lower quality, unwashed coal)
  • pollution is a regressive tax; the lower your income, the less able you are to buy high quality masks and filters, the more likely you are to work outside and within industry
  • lack of regulations, weak enforcement and corruption are to blame — for example, China’s big oil companies set fuel quality standards (e.g., Sinopec) and are quasi-governmental enterprises
  • with China’s continued economic growth, urbanization and transition from developing to developed economy, she believes many of these environmental problems are still in early stages
  • LA has 1.7M people and 1.3M cars! but while car ownership has tripled since the 70s, emissions have dropped by 75% due to strict regulations and new technology (e.g., diesel pollution filters mandatory for commercial trucks)

PS. and if you’re wondering why I said mind-blasted and not mind-blown, Russell Peters has your answer