Meditation: an update on doing zen meditation for three years

meditation-raccoonIt’s a good time to review my meditation practice. My first essay about meditation was published in early 2013. An update came in late 2014.

The important lessons and insights haven’t changed. There just don’t seem to be any new wow moments:

  • It’s still most enjoyable to meditate in the morning (when it also has the greatest benefit for my mood and productivity)
  • Ten to fifteen minutes is still my sweet spot. Anything longer, and I create excuses to not do it. Anything shorter, and its effects aren’t as noticeable or consistent.
  • I still practice a simple form of meditation: what could best be described as zen meditation, also known as seated meditation or zazen. I sit down and empty the mind, allowing thoughts and feelings to arise and depart without judgment or attachment, until my iPhone timer rings
  • I still worry that even as meditation minimizes the emotional lows, it also dampens the highs and, possibly, through this mechanic, curtails your ambition, reduces your energy, numbs your healthy urges…

That’s not to say the time has been wasted. There have been a few new realizations about meditation as a daily habit:

  • Research shows that meditation dampens activity in your pre-frontal cortex, which is the brain region that creates a boundary between yourself and the world around you. Maybe this is why, after a good session, I feel a strong bond with everything around me: trees, strangers, the fresh air. It’s similar to the effect of certain drugs, but cleaner and more peaceful
  • Meditation’s impact is mixed. Some days are good, most days are meh, and some days feel wasted. But occasionally, on the great days, very occasionally, the impact of meditation is instant and obvious and washes over me like a two hour swedish massage. My eyes will be closed. I’m trying to relax. Suddenly, instead of seeing a vast void of blackness, suddenly, I’m looking right in front of me, at the here and now of the darkness, right at the front of my eyes, the back of my eyelids. This is often accompanied by visualizations – dim shifting and fractal patterns of light – even as my mind and body slide into a deep calm
  • The moments of stillness, of being centered, of feeling at peace, that sometimes come in the session and stay for hours…when your rushing thoughts and bubbling doubts and frantic scurrying leave your mental house and the door’s shut firmly behind them and they can’t get back in…that’s what makes it all worthwhile
  • I’m not a fan of guided meditation. Yes, I agree that it’s probably better than no practice, but, if you’ll excuse this ragged analogy, guided meditation is like learning to appreciate silence by listening to classical music. And by substituting a “good enough” solution, without a plan to remove that crutch, you deny yourself the chance to experience something deeper, purer, more powerful
  • Jerry Seinfeld has done transcendental meditation for decades. In an interview, he compared a session of meditation to a great nap where you awaken and feel refreshed and recharged
  • Human beings are animals. In a way, meditation is an absolute denial of our animal nature. Instead of thinking, we unthink. Instead of feeling, we don’t feel. Instead of moving, we are still. We simply be. And if meditation’s benefit comes from denying our animal nature, then logically, if we push this thinking further, maybe any activity that challenges and opposes our animal nature – such as fasting or celibacy or religious devotion – will achieve the same results, push us toward the same spiritual, divine, uniquely human unknown

Finally, perhaps the most important lesson I’ve learned in recent years: your mind is like a young dog. It can bark at friendly strangers. Chase pigeons wildly and chew up sandals (yes, my dog does all of these, sigh). But meditation is useful because it trains your mind, the crazy dog that it is, through repetition and effort and growth, to become calm, to control itself, to separate real from fake threats, to conserve energy for important things, like cuddling with its human.

And if a habits genie granted wishes on my daily routine, wish #1 would be to guarantee that I meditate for 30 minutes every morning. Without fail. Alas, no such luck. But the benefits would be tremendous…

Thanks for reading, as always. Love to hear from you if you meditate or have any reactions to this essay. Thank you!

Winners Always Finish: a review of the famous Grit study by Angela Duckworth

Behavioral psychology concepts tend to explode onto the scene like Billboard #1 songs. And then they’re discarded just as quickly. Only a few have staying power: Mikhail C’s description of flow and why it’s so good to get lost in your work. Carol Dweck’s concept of a growth mindset and the value of believing that failure isn’t a permanent condition.

To those two (and some others), I would add Angela Duckworth’s famous grit study. Like all psychology findings that stick around, it has a catchy keyword and it reveals a truth about human behavior that is both intuitive and surprising. Whether you’re gritty or not, you want more of it, and you especially want your kids to have it.

So I finally read the original research paper because I’m a nerd who is obsessed with habits, and I believe grit can be a habit.

The brief summary: “don’t give up and you’ll eventually succeed.” But there’s a lot more to the study and its findings. As academic research papers go, it was a fun one to read. I wanted to share some of the nuances and insights with you.

So what is grit?

Grit is “perseverance and passion for long-term goals. Grit entails working strenuously toward challenges, maintaining effort and interest over years despite failure, adversity, and plateaus in progress”

Winners always finish

Many people think that grit is about working hard and not quitting. But grit is also about FOLLOWING THROUGH on what you start. Gritty people commit to one pursuit, to the exclusion of others. They finish what they begin. That’s what makes them winners.

Follow-through is “evidence of purposeful continuous commitment to certain types of activities versus sporadic efforts in diverse areas”

“whereas the importance of working harder is easily apprehended, the importance of working longer without switching objectives may be less perceptible […] eg, a prodigy who practices intensively yet moves from piano to saxophone to voice will likely be surpassed by an equally gifted but grittier child”

The concept of follow through seems to be ignored when we talk about grit.

More notes and excerpts

  • if you’re conscientious, chances are you’re also gritty
  • grit is not correlated with general intelligence. in fact there is some evidence that it’s inversely correlated
  • high achievers [are] triply blessed by “ability combined with zeal and with capacity for hard labour”
  • forget 10 years of practice, 20 is even better: “over 10 years of daily deliberate practice set apart expert performers from less proficient peers and that 20 years of dedicated practice was an even more reliable predictor of world-class achievement”
  • grit increases with age and level of education (graduate students had the most grit…)
  • grit isn’t everything, especially when young. the authors specifically state, “a strong desire for novelty and a low threshold for frustration may be adaptive earlier in life: Moving on from dead-end pursuits is essential to the discovery of more promising paths”
  • but grit predicted things like: drop out rates during Westpoint’s summer Beast Barracks; performance at the National Spelling Bee; GPAs at the top universities; graduation rates at inner city schools

and just because it’s interesting:

“Participants (at the National Spelling Bee Finals) studied for the spelling bee an average of 2.25 hours per day on weekends and 1.34 hours per day on weekdays”

Angela gives a TED talk, embedded below. It’s interesting, although it’s not a summary of her research:

If you like these talks here’s my list of TED talks and notes.

More thoughts on grit

I’m reminded of Rule 50 from The Little Book of Talent: “Build grit, love the grind”

I’m reminded of David Brooks who says that love is both transcendent magic and a gritty commitment.

Paul Tough, in a podcast (it might have been an episode of This American Life), says that the ideal stage to start teaching grit is adolescence, when people first become “meta cognitive”. And to build grit, a close attachment to a parental figure is important (I suppose for the sense of safety and security?).

Thanks for reading! What psych studies / research papers are your favorites?

Quotes! The way to fame goes through the palaces, the way to happiness goes through the markets, the way to virtue goes through the deserts.

I’ve highlighted my favorites. December was the last quotes post, so my apologies – there are quite a few!

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let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us – Hebrews 12

Alexander the Great met a naked wise man, a gymnosophist. Alexander asked, “What are you doing?” and the gymnosophist answered, “I’m experiencing nothingness.” Then the gymnosophist asked, “What are you doing?” and Alexander said, “I am conquering the world.” And they both laughed.

Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past – Lily Tomlin

Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. – Litany against Fear, used by the Bene Gesserit

Do those things that incline you toward the big questions, and avoid the things that would reduce you and make you trivial. – George Saunders

Gossip is black magic at its very worst because it is pure poison. We learned how to gossip by agreement. When we were children, we heard the adults around us gossiping all the time, openly giving their opinions about other people. They even had opinions about people they didn’t know. Emotional poison was transferred along with the opinions, and we learned this as the normal way to communicate. – Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements

“Ask someone to give a description of the personality type which he finds most despicable, most unbearable and hateful, and most impossible to get along with,” writes Edward Whitmont, “and he will produce a description of his own repressed characteristics….These very qualities are so unacceptable to him precisely because they represent his own repressed side; only that which we cannot accept within ourselves do we find impossible to live with in others.”

Every time you wake up and ask yourself, “What good things am I going to do today?” remember that, when the sun goes down at sunset, it will take a part of your life with it. – an Indian proverb

You should be truthful; you should avoid wrath; you should give to those who ask, because they ask for small things. You will become holier by following these three paths. – Dhammapada, a book of Buddhist wisdom

Is there anything more absurd than a person having a right to kill me because we live on two opposite banks of the river, and our kings quarrel with each other? – Blaise Pascal

No man really knows about other human beings. The best he can do is to suppose that they are like himself. – John Steinbeck

A lot of us think everyone else is living in Maslow’s Basement, while we’re in the Penthouse.

All our life, so far as it has definite form, is but a mass of habits – William James

Eternity is in love with the creations of time. – Blake

People are insanely self-conscious. People act like they’re always being watched. Even their house is a performance. – Elaine Miller

Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding. – Proverbs 4:7, King James Bible

Discipline is just choosing between what you want now and what you want most. – Abe Lincoln

Who are…the greatest benefactors of the living generation of mankind? I should say: ‘Confucius and Laotze, the Buddha, the Prophets of Israel and Judah, Zoroaster, Jesus, Mohammed and Socrates.’ – Toynbee

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. – Maya Angelou

A deep river is not troubled if you throw a stone into it. If a religious person is hurt by criticism, then he is not a river but a shallow pool. – Saadi

So the Muse whispered in Beethoven’s ear. Maybe she hummed a few bars into a million other ears. But no one else heard her. Only Beethoven got it. – Steven Pressfield

conventional attitudes about work are, without the owners even knowing it, nth-degree imitations of the attitudes of people who’ve done great things. – pg

If you want to make ambitious people waste their time on errands, the way to do it is to bait the hook with prestige – pg

To maximize our own contentment, we seek the minimum amount of technology in our lives. Yet to maximize the contentment of others, we must maximize the amount of technology in the world. – Kevin Kelly

Goldie Hawn once observed that there are only three ages for an actress in Hollywood: “Babe, D.A., and Driving Miss Daisy.”

Whoever does not have the stomach for this fight, let him depart, give him his money to speed his departure, since we wish not to die in this man’s company. Whoever lives past today and comes home safely will rouse himself every year on this day and show his neighbor his scars, and tell him stories of their great feats in battle. These stories he will teach his son and from this day until the end of the world we shall be remembered. We few…we happy few…we band of brothers. For whoever has shed his blood with me shall be my brother. And those men afraid to go will think themselves lesser men as they hear of how we fought and died together. – Henry V, Shakespeare

The way to fame goes through the palaces, the way to happiness goes through the markets, the way to virtue goes through the deserts.

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Daily Habits Checklist: March 7-13

daily habits checklist, march 7-13

  • This was my best week yet (don’t worry, I don’t sustain this pace. March 14-20 is much worse)
  • I’m reminded again of the need to spend at least one hour on an activity if you want to improve your performance and create a habit
  • The daily checklist has improved my performance. Probably common sense…it ups the stakes, it becomes a public commitment, and a continual reminder. Yes, maintaining the checklist takes time and effort and can feel a hassle, but so far has been worth the investment
  • Each of my habits has one reliable trigger. When I fail to setup the trigger, the habit usually fails. For example, my singing trigger is to take a singing lesson. Seems obvious but is quite effective. When I take a lesson that week, I practice a lot more (before and after the lesson). With writing, my trigger is a quiet morning. I also must start to write before working on anything else, like emails. If I create that calm morning environment and begin writing, I can almost always write for an hour. For challenging habits, I need to identify these triggers. For example, how do I reliably wake before 8am??Struggling with that one!

Why do I track all this stuff? Click here. And here’s my performance last week.

Thanks for reading! What are your habits? How do you track them? I’d love to hear from you.

TED talk notes: Jill Tarter on the search for aliens and Noah Feldman on Islam as technology

Listening to TED talks used to be a regular habit of mine. So periodically, I publish some of those notes. It’s both a personal refresher and a chance to share valuable knowledge with readers. Here’s the complete list of TED notes.

This week we have talks from Jill Tarter on the search for alien life and Noah Feldman on Islam as a technology.

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Jill Tarter: Why the search for alien intelligence matters

  • “we live on a fragile island of life”
  • “if we’re alone…incredible waste of space”
  • discovering other cultured civilizations could strengthen humanity’s bonds with each other
  • “we’re a billion year lineage of wandering stardust”
  • SETI began 50 years ago, it’s the archaeology of the future (given speed of light)
  • our sun is one of 400 billion stars in the Milky Way galaxy, and the Milky Way is only one of 100 billion other galaxies (!)
  • the more we learn the wider our “livable space” becomes (e.g., the more stars, the more species in extreme environments we’ve discovered just on Earth)
  • on Earth life happened quickly. the majority of time (90+%) has been spent developing and evolving life, not waiting for it to arise
  • Copernican revolution changed our thinking in many areas (astronomy, physics, theology). Finding alien life would be comparable
  • Drake conducted the first SETI observation of distant stars
  • Paul Allen and Nathan Myrhvold are generous supporters
  • “we all belong to one tribe, Earthlings”

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Noah Feldman: Politics and religion are technologies

  • politics and religion are analyzable as technologies, via conceptual design
  • democracy is a technology to channel power from many into the hands of a few
  • Islam is a means of construing the universe as way to bring salvation to its followers and to achieve goals such as peace, justice, equality as viewed within its doctrine
  • “because they’re technologies, they’re manipulable”
  • democracy and Islam are portrayed as incompatible, but technologies are more malleable than that
  • an Egyptian group of activists were blocked from forming a party which presented as combination of democracy and Islam

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Here’s the full list of TED notes!